10 Random Poker Quotes

• Ive always like the quote, "Who needs balls when you got the nuts!!!"
• Fook the floosh droo!
• (after a particularly bad beat) "that was a terrible call" "it's called gambling" "no it's called really sucking at life especially poker and trying to throw your money away because your life is useless and you have been pondering suicide for the last week but getting lucky enough to keep it"
• "Not all trappers wear 'coon-skin hats."
• "You can shear a sheep many times; you can skin it only once." -- Amarillo Slim
• Nobody would play the game if the best hand always won. -Will Schwarz
• Think of how stupid the average poker player is. By definition, half of them are dumber than that.
• God does not play dice with the universe; He plays an ineffible game of his own devising, which might be compared, from the perspective of any of the other players, to being involved in an obscure and complex version of poker in a pitch dark room, with blank cards, for infinite stakes, with a dealer who won't tell you the rules, and who smiles all the time. --Gaiman and Pratchett's "Good Omens"
• Most poker players agree, having sex is much akin to playing a game - both require a good hand.
• You have to piss with the dick you have