10 Random Poker Quotes

• How do you get a professional poker player off your porch? Pay him for the pizza.
• " Dear Lord, help me to break even. I need the money."
• "No river, no fish."
• Poker players and police officers have alot in common. Hours and hours of boredom with a few moments of sheer terror.
• Always play hands where both hole cards are different suits. It doubles the possibility of hitting a flush. Anon.
• "Last night I stayed up late playing poker with Tarot cards. I got a full house and four people died." -- Steven Wright
• Poker is like petting a cat, you need some hands.
• "Losers always whine about their best. Winners go home and fuck the prom queen."
• Ive always like the quote, "Who needs balls when you got the nuts!!!"
• "You can shear a sheep many times; you can skin it only once." -- Amarillo Slim