10 Random Poker Quotes

• When I play badly, I lose fast. When I play well, I lose slowly. In a tournament, the net result is the same: I LOSE! - RH 11-6-05
• Most poker players agree, having sex is much akin to playing a game - both require a good hand.
• For all you probability freaks, remember to consider the probability that an opponent is lying. Generally, liars dig holes and keep on lying, at least in the short run, as they try to climb out. Adjust your math prowess accordingly. Tells are paramount, as much or more as your calculating brain is. Poker becomes super-multi-variable when the psychological realm is joined with that already beautiful world of card probabilities. -- a mathematician
• "There are few things that are so unpardonably neglected in our country as poker. The upper class knows very little about it. Now and then you find ambassadors who have sort of a general knowledge of the game, but the ignorance of the people is fearful. Why, I have known clergymen, good men, kind-hearted, liberal, sincere, and all that, who did not know the meaning of a "flush". It is enough to make one ashamed of the species." --Mark Twain
• some call cheating immoral, but then again, it's immoral to let a sucker keep his money.
• Fold and live to fold again
• There is less luck involved than a bad player thinks there is, and there more luck involved than a good player will admit there is
• The only way to win is to play. Unfortunetly, it is also the only way to loose.
• Poker players and police officers have alot in common. Hours and hours of boredom with a few moments of sheer terror.
• Poker is like masturbating. It's fun, highly addictive, and eventually gives you the feeling of getting fucked.