10 Random Poker Quotes

• "Does this look like a man beat by jacks!"-Rounders
• Play like a cunt, get fucked like one!
• "So again, do not raise in No Limit Hold'em -- especially tournaments -- if there is a reasonable chance that a reraise will make you throw up." -- David Sklansky (Tournament Poker for Advanced Players)
• "My luck is so bad, if it were raining pussy, I'd get hit in the head with a dick" -ItalianAce-
• what is a river if there is no river to draw to water
• "I'm broke one day and have a fortune the next day, and I don't give a damn" --Jack "Treetop" Straus--
• Poker is like masturbating. It's fun, highly addictive, and eventually gives you the feeling of getting fucked.
• "Never say 'Whoa' to a mud puddle" -- Anonymous $4-to-go NL A-5 Lowball Table, Cameo Club Palo Alto CA, 1977
• Any two cards can lose... and they usually do.
• I should have stayed home and played with myself.