10 Random Poker Quotes

• "It's always good to get a nice dick-suckin before a tournament...it calms the senses." Alex Powers
• Last night I stayed up late playing poker with Tarot cards. I got a full house and four people died. — Steven Wright
• Nixon financed his first political campaign with money he won playing poker against his fellow naval officers.
• Playing poker for play money is like going to a strip club for the food. -UncleWaldo
• I'd rather be good than lucky, I'd rather be lucky than lose...
• "never count your money when your sitting at the table, there will be time enough for counting, when the dealings done."
• Two cowboys at table. One suddenly plunges a dagger through the hand of the other player, pinning the hand to the table. Then he says to his wounded opponent, "Sir, if that is not an ace of spades hidden beneath your hand, then I owe you an apology."
• You know that you've seen a lot of poker when three people are all in before the flop, two of them turn over aces and the other turns over kings, and the king hits on the river, and you say, "I've seen that before, and ...."
• Right now I only play online poker. If I ever play live poker, raise preflop with a good hand, get called by someone with a 52 who hits a straight, I am walking over to that person to knock out his teeth. Congratulations you idiot.
• The next best thing to playing poker and winning, is playing poker and losing.