10 Random Poker Quotes

If only I'd read, "Winning at Internet Poker For Dummies." 'Til now, I never thought I qualified.
With all the new poker players I cant play holdem with a pair of gloves
Upon entering a cardroom in which a player had never before played, he asked the floorman for a 10-20 hold-em seat. The floorman dutifully put him on the list and told him that the only available seat was at 3-6 Omaha HiLo. The player quipped, "No, I don't have enough money to play limits that high."
Remember these three simple words and you'll never go broke........ "Stick em Up!"
"I got a full house! Whatchu got, sucker?" "Gee, does that beat me? All I got is two pair: a pair-a ones...and, uh, ANUDDA pair-a ones." -Nasta Canasta & Bugs Bunny, "Barbary Coast Bunny"
Most poker players agree, having sex is much akin to playing a game - both require a good hand.
"My luck is so bad, if it were raining pussy, I'd get hit in the head with a dick" -ItalianAce-
To win a bit of money, make your opponent think your hand is stronger than it is. To win a lot of money, make him think your hand is weaker than it is. - Josh Avery
If you don't want to get beat on the river, don't get in a hand with me. -- Dan Nelson
Where's the buffet? -Doyle Brunson