10 Random Poker Quotes

• "So, what did you have?" "A pair...of balls."
• " Dear Lord, help me to break even. I need the money."
• Nixon financed his first political campaign with money he won playing poker against his fellow naval officers.
• "So again, do not raise in No Limit Hold'em -- especially tournaments -- if there is a reasonable chance that a reraise will make you throw up." -- David Sklansky (Tournament Poker for Advanced Players)
• Poker is like masturbating. It's fun, highly addictive, and eventually gives you the feeling of getting fucked.
• Seldom do the lambs slaughter the butcher. -Amarillo Slim
• Always play hands where both hole cards are different suits. It doubles the possibility of hitting a flush. Anon.
• "Just play every hand, you can't miss them all." -Sammy Farha's reply to, "How does he do it?"
• Someone on here said that "poker is for fat American losers". That sounds a lot like the ramblings of a foriegn homosexual who's busy scratching a broke ass.
• Sign hanging in old time saloon: Liquor in the front, poker in the rear. -The old sage.