10 Random Poker Quotes

• ''when i bet i either have nuts or balls.''FRAN PINCHOT
• Those eggs smell delicious!
• when i folded an A-7 suited under the gun which would've ended up giving me the small end of a mini jackpot, my dad said, "yeah, if i would've driven to Tucson, I would've found that diamond ring. But i don't drive to Tucson."
• Poker is like masturbating. It's fun, highly addictive, and eventually gives you the feeling of getting fucked.
• Right now I only play online poker. If I ever play live poker, raise preflop with a good hand, get called by someone with a 52 who hits a straight, I am walking over to that person to knock out his teeth. Congratulations you idiot.
• The only way to win is to play. Unfortunetly, it is also the only way to loose.
• All I wanted in my divorce settlement was my computer - Pokerroom.com
• Hold em' is like sex... everyone thinks they are great at it, but most people dont know what the hell they are doing.
• I've raised with cards less attractive than what's in my toilet after I took a dump in it. - Gus Hansen
• I don't really mind getting bad beats. Of course, 9 times out of 10, my superior cards will win. But that 1 time in 10 that someone catches lucky cards and beats me, I don't get mad. Because each of the next 9 times they think they can catch something adds another inch to my television.