10 Random Poker Quotes

• Two cowboys at table. One suddenly plunges a dagger through the hand of the other player, pinning the hand to the table. Then he says to his wounded opponent, "Sir, if that is not an ace of spades hidden beneath your hand, then I owe you an apology."
• "Poker is 100% skill, 50% luck" - Phil Hellmuth
• Acey Deucy Never Leucy --Phil Hellmuth
• "Take my advice and do as you please" - TJ Cloutier
• A great poker player knows when he is playing poorly.
• If you play 69, always bet on the come.
• "never count your money when your sitting at the table, there will be time enough for counting, when the dealings done."
• Someone on here said that "poker is for fat American losers". That sounds a lot like the ramblings of a foriegn homosexual who's busy scratching a broke ass.
• I don't really mind getting bad beats. Of course, 9 times out of 10, my superior cards will win. But that 1 time in 10 that someone catches lucky cards and beats me, I don't get mad. Because each of the next 9 times they think they can catch something adds another inch to my television.
• Got married to a hand, and discovered I got set up with a she-male.