10 Random Poker Quotes

• The next best thing to playing poker and winning, is playing poker and losing.
• Great poker players are separated from good poker players not by how they win their hands, but how they lose them.
• God does not play dice with the universe; He plays an ineffible game of his own devising, which might be compared, from the perspective of any of the other players, to being involved in an obscure and complex version of poker in a pitch dark room, with blank cards, for infinite stakes, with a dealer who won't tell you the rules, and who smiles all the time. --Gaiman and Pratchett's "Good Omens"
• Hold em' is like sex... everyone thinks they are great at it, but most people dont know what the hell they are doing.
• "Not all trappers wear 'coon-skin hats."
• "It's always good to get a nice dick-suckin before a tournament...it calms the senses." Alex Powers
• Upon entering a cardroom in which a player had never before played, he asked the floorman for a 10-20 hold-em seat. The floorman dutifully put him on the list and told him that the only available seat was at 3-6 Omaha HiLo. The player quipped, "No, I don't have enough money to play limits that high."
• The best thing about that hand was I wasn't in it
• Right now I only play online poker. If I ever play live poker, raise preflop with a good hand, get called by someone with a 52 who hits a straight, I am walking over to that person to knock out his teeth. Congratulations you idiot.
• When you're drawing dead, you always get there.