10 Random Poker Quotes

• "I already messed this hand up pretty good, so I may as well call." Chris Ferguson
• Ive always like the quote, "Who needs balls when you got the nuts!!!"
• Last night I stayed up late playing poker with Tarot cards. I got a full house and four people died. — Steven Wright
• "If the flop don't fit, you must aquit" -Matt Thornton, Dayton, Ohio
• "I swear to god if you beat me and i will get my gun out of the car and kill you...and your family." -Uncle Remus
• The one who bets the most wins; cards just break ties.
• I don't really mind getting bad beats. Of course, 9 times out of 10, my superior cards will win. But that 1 time in 10 that someone catches lucky cards and beats me, I don't get mad. Because each of the next 9 times they think they can catch something adds another inch to my television.
• I couldn't bet it, so I gave my Aunt $2 to make a bet for me. She didn't want me to be disappointed by losing my first bet, so she bought a show ticket. The horse won. It's been 40 years, I still havn't spoken to her again. --Gary Carson
• Sex is good, but poker lasts longer.
• "never count your money when your sitting at the table, there will be time enough for counting, when the dealings done."