10 Random Poker Quotes

• Play like a cunt, get fucked like one!
• I've noticed something funny ... the more I practice, the luckier I get. -- Jack Nicklaus
• "Poker is just like the fucking universe man, the different combinations and outs are infinite so it's pointless racking your mind about bad beats and shit" Stephen Morris
• Life is a gamble at terrible odds if it was a bet you would never take it
• When I play badly, I lose fast. When I play well, I lose slowly. In a tournament, the net result is the same: I LOSE! - RH 11-6-05
• Famous last words before he became a eunuch 'Id bet my bollocks on this hand'
• If you cant spot the fish in the first ten minutes, you are the fish.
• I have two small pair.....8's and 8's.
• women can't play poker cause they don't have the nuts
• God does not play dice with the universe; He plays an ineffible game of his own devising, which might be compared, from the perspective of any of the other players, to being involved in an obscure and complex version of poker in a pitch dark room, with blank cards, for infinite stakes, with a dealer who won't tell you the rules, and who smiles all the time. --Gaiman and Pratchett's "Good Omens"