10 Random Poker Quotes

• Son, when a man bets you that the jack of spades will rise out of the dwck and squirt water in your ear: son, don't take that bet, for, as sure as eggs is eggs, you'll end up with a wet ear.
• No bad beat can withstand the assault of laughter!
• "if you riffle shuffle a standard deck exactly 9 times the cards will return to its original position as it were prior to the 9 riffle shuffles."
• "So again, do not raise in No Limit Hold'em -- especially tournaments -- if there is a reasonable chance that a reraise will make you throw up." -- David Sklansky (Tournament Poker for Advanced Players)
• some call cheating immoral, but then again, it's immoral to let a sucker keep his money.
• (after a particularly bad beat) "that was a terrible call" "it's called gambling" "no it's called really sucking at life especially poker and trying to throw your money away because your life is useless and you have been pondering suicide for the last week but getting lucky enough to keep it"
• Sign hanging in old time saloon: Liquor in the front, poker in the rear. -The old sage.
• Most poker players agree, having sex is much akin to playing a game - both require a good hand.
• Fish don't eat Nutz!
• Poker is like a horse, five letters, two vowels