10 Random Poker Quotes

• I play like a mullet: tight up front and loose in the back.
• Play like a cunt, get fucked like one!
• If you cant spot the fish in the first ten minutes, you are the fish.
• I couldn't bet it, so I gave my Aunt $2 to make a bet for me. She didn't want me to be disappointed by losing my first bet, so she bought a show ticket. The horse won. It's been 40 years, I still havn't spoken to her again. --Gary Carson
• Playing poker for play money is like going to a strip club for the food. -UncleWaldo
• Fish don't eat Nutz!
• I've raised with cards less attractive than what's in my toilet after I took a dump in it. - Gus Hansen
• If luck wasn't a factor, I'd win every one. -Phil Hellmuth
• Sign hanging in old time saloon: Liquor in the front, poker in the rear. -The old sage.
• Frying bacon is much like playing poker; in each, a pig must be slaughtered and consumed by a superior being.