10 Random Poker Quotes

• Think of how stupid the median poker player is. By definition, half of them are dumber than that.
• The next best thing to playing poker and winning, is playing poker and losing.
• If you lock 100 retards in a room and make them play a tournament, one of them has to win. If you do that in each state, you will produce 50 state champions. If you lock those 50 retards in a room, call it the Poker Championship of the Universe, one of them has to win, and then PokerStars gets 10%.
• " Dear Lord, help me to break even. I need the money."
• "All-in, bitches!!!"
• "You gotta know when to hold 'em, know when to fold 'em." -Kenny Rogers
• If only I'd read, "Winning at Internet Poker For Dummies." 'Til now, I never thought I qualified.
• When I was young, I heard that all you need is a chip and chair. Now that I am old, I realize that they weren't talking about tortilla chips.
• A pair of Aces with a low kicker is like a chick without nipples... -doyle brunson, circa 1986
• "Percentage players die broke too, Burt." -Fast Eddie Felson "The Hustler"