10 Random Poker Quotes

• All I wanted in my divorce settlement was my computer - Pokerroom.com
• Liquor up front, poker in the rear
• Any two cards can lose... and they usually do.
• Poker is for fat, American losers.
• Poker is like masturbating. It's fun, highly addictive, and eventually gives you the feeling of getting fucked.
• "So, what did you have?" "A pair...of balls."
• "Losers always whine about their best. Winners go home and fuck the prom queen."
• "never count your money when your sitting at the table, there will be time enough for counting, when the dealings done."
• Son, when a man bets you that the jack of spades will rise out of the dwck and squirt water in your ear: son, don't take that bet, for, as sure as eggs is eggs, you'll end up with a wet ear.
• women can't play poker cause they don't have the nuts