10 Random Poker Quotes

• Sex is like poker. It feels better to go all in. --Jarod Kintz
• "if you riffle shuffle a standard deck exactly 9 times the cards will return to its original position as it were prior to the 9 riffle shuffles."
• It's Free To Fold...
• All I wanted in my divorce settlement was my computer - Pokerroom.com
• I don't really mind getting bad beats. Of course, 9 times out of 10, my superior cards will win. But that 1 time in 10 that someone catches lucky cards and beats me, I don't get mad. Because each of the next 9 times they think they can catch something adds another inch to my television.
• I play like a mullet: tight up front and loose in the back.
• If you lock 100 retards in a room and make them play a tournament, one of them has to win. If you do that in each state, you will produce 50 state champions. If you lock those 50 retards in a room, call it the Poker Championship of the Universe, one of them has to win, and then PokerStars gets 10%.
• what is a river if there is no river to draw to water
• How do you get a professional poker player off your porch? Pay him for the pizza.
• Don't challenge strong players, challange weak ones. That's what they're there for. - John Vorhaus, author of Killer Poker