10 Random Poker Quotes

• I cried because I had no draw, until I met a man with no pair.
• "So again, do not raise in No Limit Hold'em -- especially tournaments -- if there is a reasonable chance that a reraise will make you throw up." -- David Sklansky (Tournament Poker for Advanced Players)
• Fook the floosh droo!
• All I wanted in my divorce settlement was my computer - Pokerroom.com
• I couldn't bet it, so I gave my Aunt $2 to make a bet for me. She didn't want me to be disappointed by losing my first bet, so she bought a show ticket. The horse won. It's been 40 years, I still havn't spoken to her again. --Gary Carson
• Think of how stupid the average poker player is. By definition, half of them are dumber than that.
• "you got to know when to holdem, know when to fold em, know when to walk away, know when to run..."
• How do you get a professional poker player off your porch? Pay him for the pizza.
• Play like a cunt, get fucked like one!
• women can't play poker cause they don't have the nuts