10 Random Poker Quotes

• Never educate a stupid poker player.
• Any two cards can lose... and they usually do.
• Always play hands where both hole cards are different suits. It doubles the possibility of hitting a flush. Anon.
• Got married to a hand, and discovered I got set up with a she-male.
• Take me to the river. Wash me in the water.
• "I dont mind getting beaten by a good player, and I dont even mind getting beaten by a bad player, but I cant stand getting beaten by a bad player who thinks he is good." H.L.B. Tunica, MS
• "Losers always whine about their best. Winners go home and fuck the prom queen."
• Frying bacon is much like playing poker; in each, a pig must be slaughtered and consumed by a superior being.
• "Hooks (pair of Jacks) are for Fish. You've got to flop 'em, fold 'em, or fornicate 'em." Johnnie Moss
• I've noticed something funny ... the more I practice, the luckier I get. -- Jack Nicklaus