10 Random Poker Quotes

• Poker is for loners.
• No bad beat can withstand the assault of laughter!
• how do you know when simon trumper has just got lucky? a bit of his hair falls out.
• "Listen, here's the thing. If you can't spot the sucker in the first half hour at the table, then you ARE the sucker." - Mike McDermott (Rounders, 1998)
• Most poker players agree, having sex is much akin to playing a game - both require a good hand.
• You know that you've seen a lot of poker when three people are all in before the flop, two of them turn over aces and the other turns over kings, and the king hits on the river, and you say, "I've seen that before, and ...."
• If you lock 100 retards in a room and make them play a tournament, one of them has to win. If you do that in each state, you will produce 50 state champions. If you lock those 50 retards in a room, call it the Poker Championship of the Universe, one of them has to win, and then PokerStars gets 10%.
• "Last night I stayed up late playing poker with Tarot cards. I got a full house and four people died." -- Steven Wright
• "If the flop don't fit, you must aquit" -Matt Thornton, Dayton, Ohio
• Normally, I wouldn't have called you, but you've been running bad!