10 Random Poker Quotes

• Got married to a hand, and discovered I got set up with a she-male.
• Whaddya think you're playing against- an empty chair?
• Nobody would play the game if the best hand always won. -Will Schwarz
• Homer: Your mother has this crazy idea that gambling is wrong. Even though they say it's okay in the Bible. Lisa: Really? Where? Homer: Eh, somewhere in the back.
• Welcome to kicker school
• Seldom do the lambs slaughter the butcher. -Amarillo Slim
• Asked why he played in a game known to be crooked, a player replied, "But it's the only game in town."
• Poker is like masturbating. It's fun, highly addictive, and eventually gives you the feeling of getting fucked.
• Always play hands where both hole cards are different suits. It doubles the possibility of hitting a flush. Anon.
• Son, when a man bets you that the jack of spades will rise out of the dwck and squirt water in your ear: son, don't take that bet, for, as sure as eggs is eggs, you'll end up with a wet ear.