10 Random Poker Quotes

• women can't play poker cause they don't have the nuts
• I don't want to be called a good loser. A good loser is still a loser. -Stu Unger
• Life is a gamble at terrible odds if it was a bet you would never take it
• The best feeling in the world if flopping the nut straight against two players acting before you who both flopped sets. I'll take my chances against 5 outs.
• "I raise, therefore I am." - Howard Lederer
• "That's the best I ever misread a hand." Unknown NL holdem tourney player at Taj Mahal, December 2003, after going all in on the flop, mistakenly believing he had a flush, but rivering a flush anyway
• Got married to a hand, and discovered I got set up with a she-male.
• "if you riffle shuffle a standard deck exactly 9 times the cards will return to its original position as it were prior to the 9 riffle shuffles."
• If you lock 100 retards in a room and make them play a tournament, one of them has to win. If you do that in each state, you will produce 50 state champions. If you lock those 50 retards in a room, call it the Poker Championship of the Universe, one of them has to win, and then PokerStars gets 10%.
• No Limit Hold'em - Hours of boredom followed by moments of sheer terror.