10 Random Poker Quotes

• "Listen, here's the thing. If you can't spot the sucker in the first half hour at the table, then you ARE the sucker." - Mike McDermott (Rounders, 1998)
• I couldn't bet it, so I gave my Aunt $2 to make a bet for me. She didn't want me to be disappointed by losing my first bet, so she bought a show ticket. The horse won. It's been 40 years, I still havn't spoken to her again. --Gary Carson
• In the game of life, women are the rake. - Worm
• Last night I stayed up late playing poker with Tarot cards. I got a full house and four people died. — Steven Wright
• Great poker players are separated from good poker players not by how they win their hands, but how they lose them.
• I used to go out, go dancing, and talk to the chicks. Now, my life has been down-sized to the couch, the laptop, and the occasional cranberry and rum. --The 5 card stud---
• "if you riffle shuffle a standard deck exactly 9 times the cards will return to its original position as it were prior to the 9 riffle shuffles."
• Play like a cunt, get fucked like one!
• If there was no luck involved I'd win every time. - Phil Hellmuth
• When you're drawing dead, you always get there.