10 Random Poker Quotes

• the perfect poker player deploys his masterful execution of logic and then litters it with chaotic sequences of lunacy.
• Son, when a man bets you that the jack of spades will rise out of the dwck and squirt water in your ear: son, don't take that bet, for, as sure as eggs is eggs, you'll end up with a wet ear.
• No bad beat can withstand the assault of laughter!
• "Listen, here's the thing. If you can't spot the sucker in the first half hour at the table, then you ARE the sucker." - Mike McDermott (Rounders, 1998)
• Life is a gamble at terrible odds if it was a bet you would never take it
• "you got to know when to holdem, know when to fold em, know when to walk away, know when to run..."
• If you play 69, always bet on the come.
• Poker is like masturbating. It's fun, highly addictive, and eventually gives you the feeling of getting fucked.
• The one who bets the most wins; cards just break ties.
• When you're drawing dead, you always get there.