10 Random Poker Quotes

• I don't really mind getting bad beats. Of course, 9 times out of 10, my superior cards will win. But that 1 time in 10 that someone catches lucky cards and beats me, I don't get mad. Because each of the next 9 times they think they can catch something adds another inch to my television.
• Sometimes doing the right thing loses you money and the wrong thing gains you money. The trick is figuring the right time to do the wrong thing and the wrong time to do the right thing.
• "You get your chips your way, I'll get my chips mine." (Phil Ivey, to Howard Lederer)
• Son, when a man bets you that the jack of spades will rise out of the dwck and squirt water in your ear: son, don't take that bet, for, as sure as eggs is eggs, you'll end up with a wet ear.
• "Percentage players die broke too, Burt." -Fast Eddie Felson "The Hustler"
• Poker is like masturbating. It's fun, highly addictive, and eventually gives you the feeling of getting fucked.
• The next best thing to playing and winning is playing and losing. --Nick the Greek
• I'm too good for you, you might as well flip those 2 cards over.
• "Poker is just like the fucking universe man, the different combinations and outs are infinite so it's pointless racking your mind about bad beats and shit" Stephen Morris
• "Never say 'Whoa' to a mud puddle" -- Anonymous $4-to-go NL A-5 Lowball Table, Cameo Club Palo Alto CA, 1977