10 Random Poker Quotes

• Someone on here said that "poker is for fat American losers". That sounds a lot like the ramblings of a foriegn homosexual who's busy scratching a broke ass.
• Always play hands where both hole cards are different suits. It doubles the possibility of hitting a flush. Anon.
• Poker is like masturbating. It's fun, highly addictive, and eventually gives you the feeling of getting fucked.
• See AA before the flop is like a smile from the girl of your dreams, see AA lose to a pour hand on the river feels like the same chick just gave you a bad case of blue balls
• If only I'd read, "Winning at Internet Poker For Dummies." 'Til now, I never thought I qualified.
• "You get your chips your way, I'll get my chips mine." (Phil Ivey, to Howard Lederer)
• "I better straighten out my game, before I flush all my money down the toilet" - D. Drury
• Trying to find the odds (not percentage) for this hand. One person has JJ the other 1010. On the flop is J 10 10, what are the odds of this happening?
• Think of how stupid the median poker player is. By definition, half of them are dumber than that.
• "In low limit hold em' deception plays a less significant role. Either someone is already looking at that hand or will call out of curiousity." ---Lee Jones