10 Random Poker Quotes

• Got married to a hand, and discovered I got set up with a she-male.
• "I got a full house! Whatchu got, sucker?" "Gee, does that beat me? All I got is two pair: a pair-a ones...and, uh, ANUDDA pair-a ones." -Nasta Canasta & Bugs Bunny, "Barbary Coast Bunny"
• "I thought it was jack's" - Phil Helmuth Jr. WSOP vs. Jason Lester
• Playing poker for play money is like going to a strip club for the food. -UncleWaldo
• After taking a beat: "How bad do they play?...This is the World Series of Poker!" -Phil Hellmuth Jr.
• " Dear Lord, help me to break even. I need the money."
• "See, in my world - the world of high-stakes gin and poker - we play for cold, hard cash. It's all business, pure and simple. Anyone who thinks cardplaying is a 'game' - I'll show you a loser. Money... M-O-N-E-Y. That's how you measure success. One dollar at a time. One chip at a time. That's how you keep score." Stu Unger
• "First you're a champ, then you're a chimp, then you're a chump." [I was told this was a quote from Phil Hellmuth]
• I played poker with a real 10 last night, however on a slow night she only charges 5!
• Poker is like a horse, five letters, two vowels