10 Random Poker Quotes

• Son, when a man bets you that the jack of spades will rise out of the dwck and squirt water in your ear: son, don't take that bet, for, as sure as eggs is eggs, you'll end up with a wet ear.
• When I play badly, I lose fast. When I play well, I lose slowly. In a tournament, the net result is the same: I LOSE! - RH 11-6-05
• Think of how stupid the average poker player is. By definition, half of them are dumber than that.
• Dan: I got the ace too, but I have nothing to kick you with. Ian: Well, you could always take your shoe off.
• Always play hands where both hole cards are different suits. It doubles the possibility of hitting a flush. Anon.
• "All-in, bitches!!!"
• "I'm broke one day and have a fortune the next day, and I don't give a damn" --Jack "Treetop" Straus--
• women can't play poker cause they don't have the nuts
• "never count your money when your sitting at the table, there will be time enough for counting, when the dealings done."
• "No river, no fish."