10 Random Poker Quotes

• How can I miss the flop so bad that I don't even have a straight draw? -Jdoe
• For all you probability freaks, remember to consider the probability that an opponent is lying. Generally, liars dig holes and keep on lying, at least in the short run, as they try to climb out. Adjust your math prowess accordingly. Tells are paramount, as much or more as your calculating brain is. Poker becomes super-multi-variable when the psychological realm is joined with that already beautiful world of card probabilities. -- a mathematician
• If you raise with 72 offsuit, you get to raise when the flops is 7-7-2, ... once in your life. If you fold 72 offsuit, you get the free time to study your opponents or the waitresses and avoid polishing the rail with your sweater ... tough decision!
• If you cant spot the fish in the first ten minutes, you are the fish.
• Poker is like masturbating. It's fun, highly addictive, and eventually gives you the feeling of getting fucked.
• Don't look at when a player sucks out on you with a trash hand as a loss. Think of it as an investment that will be returned with interest.
• Think of how stupid the average poker player is. By definition, half of them are dumber than that.
• "Never go broke in an unraised pot" -T.J. Cloutier
• they call it poker because the word "FUCK" was taken.
• Life is a gamble at terrible odds if it was a bet you would never take it