10 Random Poker Quotes

• Poker is like petting a cat, you need some hands.
• "It's always good to get a nice dick-suckin before a tournament...it calms the senses." Alex Powers
• Liquor in the front, Poker in the rear.
• Think of how stupid the median poker player is. By definition, half of them are dumber than that.
• Please screen your these quotes, most of the crap people submit here don't classify as poker quotes at all, they just express how badly those persons misunderstand the game of poker or how proud they are that they understand elemntry concepts such as "counting outs" or "pot odds", no one cares jerks
• No bad beat can withstand the assault of laughter!
• Whaddya think you're playing against- an empty chair?
• Fold and live to fold again
• God does not play dice with the universe; He plays an ineffible game of his own devising, which might be compared, from the perspective of any of the other players, to being involved in an obscure and complex version of poker in a pitch dark room, with blank cards, for infinite stakes, with a dealer who won't tell you the rules, and who smiles all the time. --Gaiman and Pratchett's "Good Omens"
• "Last night I stayed up late playing poker with Tarot cards. I got a full house and four people died." -- Steven Wright