10 Random Poker Quotes

• "Last night I stayed up late playing poker with Tarot cards. I got a full house and four people died." -- Steven Wright
• If only I'd read, "Winning at Internet Poker For Dummies." 'Til now, I never thought I qualified.
• "I had 2 high." -Sammy Farha
• All I wanted in my divorce settlement was my computer - Pokerroom.com
• I played poker with a real 10 last night, however on a slow night she only charges 5!
• I'm a better poker player than I am a player. -RedGrant
• If you lock 100 retards in a room and make them play a tournament, one of them has to win. If you do that in each state, you will produce 50 state champions. If you lock those 50 retards in a room, call it the Poker Championship of the Universe, one of them has to win, and then PokerStars gets 10%.
• how do you know when simon trumper has just got lucky? a bit of his hair falls out.
• Got married to a hand, and discovered I got set up with a she-male.
• "If i dont make that final table, nobody's gonna remember me next year. If i do make that final table, Im a poker legend overnight" - Dutch Boyd 2003 WSOP Main Event