10 Random Poker Quotes

• No bad beat can withstand the assault of laughter!
• " Dear Lord, help me to break even. I need the money."
• Poker is like a horse, five letters, two vowels
• "What's the sound of shuffling a single card?" - tidytom
• Normally, I wouldn't have called you, but you've been running bad!
• When I was young, I heard that all you need is a chip and chair. Now that I am old, I realize that they weren't talking about tortilla chips.
• Hold em' is like sex... everyone thinks they are great at it, but most people dont know what the hell they are doing.
• When you're drawing dead, you always get there.
• I don't really mind getting bad beats. Of course, 9 times out of 10, my superior cards will win. But that 1 time in 10 that someone catches lucky cards and beats me, I don't get mad. Because each of the next 9 times they think they can catch something adds another inch to my television.
• How do you get a professional poker player off your porch? Pay him for the pizza.