10 Random Poker Quotes

• If only I'd read, "Winning at Internet Poker For Dummies." 'Til now, I never thought I qualified.
• Those eggs smell delicious!
• "You can shear a sheep many times; you can skin it only once." -- Amarillo Slim
• women can't play poker cause they don't have the nuts
• Think of how stupid the median poker player is. By definition, half of them are dumber than that.
• For all you probability freaks, remember to consider the probability that an opponent is lying. Generally, liars dig holes and keep on lying, at least in the short run, as they try to climb out. Adjust your math prowess accordingly. Tells are paramount, as much or more as your calculating brain is. Poker becomes super-multi-variable when the psychological realm is joined with that already beautiful world of card probabilities. -- a mathematician
• "Last night I stayed up late playing poker with Tarot cards. I got a full house and four people died." -- Steven Wright
• I'd rather be good than lucky, I'd rather be lucky than lose...
• If you could lose all of your money again... what would you have done differently?
• Right now I only play online poker. If I ever play live poker, raise preflop with a good hand, get called by someone with a 52 who hits a straight, I am walking over to that person to knock out his teeth. Congratulations you idiot.