10 Random Poker Quotes

• You should pay as much as possible for a free card.
• Most of these quotes are abysmal and submitted by the sort of idiots who fill the partypoker chatbox with words like 'phuktard'
• How do you get a professional poker player off your porch? Pay him for the pizza.
• No bad beat can withstand the assault of laughter!
• How can I miss the flop so bad that I don't even have a straight draw? -Jdoe
• "First you're a champ, then you're a chimp, then you're a chump." [I was told this was a quote from Phil Hellmuth]
• Got married to a hand, and discovered I got set up with a she-male.
• "Poker is 100% skill, 50% luck" - Phil Hellmuth
• If you raise with 72 offsuit, you get to raise when the flops is 7-7-2, ... once in your life. If you fold 72 offsuit, you get the free time to study your opponents or the waitresses and avoid polishing the rail with your sweater ... tough decision!
• For all you probability freaks, remember to consider the probability that an opponent is lying. Generally, liars dig holes and keep on lying, at least in the short run, as they try to climb out. Adjust your math prowess accordingly. Tells are paramount, as much or more as your calculating brain is. Poker becomes super-multi-variable when the psychological realm is joined with that already beautiful world of card probabilities. -- a mathematician