10 Random Poker Quotes

• Nobody would play the game if the best hand always won. -Will Schwarz
• "First you're a champ, then you're a chimp, then you're a chump." [I was told this was a quote from Phil Hellmuth]
• I cried because I had no draw, until I met a man with no pair.
• Poker is like petting a cat, you need some hands.
• I couldn't bet it, so I gave my Aunt $2 to make a bet for me. She didn't want me to be disappointed by losing my first bet, so she bought a show ticket. The horse won. It's been 40 years, I still havn't spoken to her again. --Gary Carson
• Last night I stayed up late playing poker with Tarot cards. I got a full house and four people died. — Steven Wright
• You have to piss with the dick you have
• "I'd rather be lucky than good" - Lefty Gomez
• Ive always like the quote, "Who needs balls when you got the nuts!!!"
• Son, when a man bets you that the jack of spades will rise out of the dwck and squirt water in your ear: son, don't take that bet, for, as sure as eggs is eggs, you'll end up with a wet ear.