10 Random Poker Quotes

• "I already messed this hand up pretty good, so I may as well call." Chris Ferguson
• You have to piss with the dick you have
• Asked why he played in a game known to be crooked, a player replied, "But it's the only game in town."
• The all-in play works everytime but once.
• "The poker player learns that sometimes both science and common sense are wrong; that the bumblebee can fly; that, perhaps, one should never trust an expert; that there are more things in heaven and earth than are dreamt of by those with an academic bent." -- David Mamet
• Always play hands where both hole cards are different suits. It doubles the possibility of hitting a flush. Anon.
• If only I'd read, "Winning at Internet Poker For Dummies." 'Til now, I never thought I qualified.
• "I could make a crazy call on you..." Sammy Farhah to Chris Moneymaker at the final table when Moneymaker went all in.
• Upon entering a cardroom in which a player had never before played, he asked the floorman for a 10-20 hold-em seat. The floorman dutifully put him on the list and told him that the only available seat was at 3-6 Omaha HiLo. The player quipped, "No, I don't have enough money to play limits that high."
• Son, when a man bets you that the jack of spades will rise out of the dwck and squirt water in your ear: son, don't take that bet, for, as sure as eggs is eggs, you'll end up with a wet ear.