10 Random Poker Quotes

• Welcome to kicker school
• "Hold em is to stud what chess is to checkers." -- Johnny Moss
• (after a particularly bad beat) "that was a terrible call" "it's called gambling" "no it's called really sucking at life especially poker and trying to throw your money away because your life is useless and you have been pondering suicide for the last week but getting lucky enough to keep it"
• Got married to a hand, and discovered I got set up with a she-male.
• "if you riffle shuffle a standard deck exactly 9 times the cards will return to its original position as it were prior to the 9 riffle shuffles."
• "Never say 'Whoa' to a mud puddle" -- Anonymous $4-to-go NL A-5 Lowball Table, Cameo Club Palo Alto CA, 1977
• when you win its got to make a difference when you lose its got to hurt.
• when i folded an A-7 suited under the gun which would've ended up giving me the small end of a mini jackpot, my dad said, "yeah, if i would've driven to Tucson, I would've found that diamond ring. But i don't drive to Tucson."
• Nobody would play the game if the best hand always won. -Will Schwarz
• "Last night I stayed up late playing poker with Tarot cards. I got a full house and four people died." -- Steven Wright