10 Random Poker Quotes

• All I wanted in my divorce settlement was my computer - Pokerroom.com
• "The kiddie game is down the street!" - Mike "the Mouth" Matusow
• "Never go broke in an unraised pot" -T.J. Cloutier
• Last night I stayed up late playing poker with Tarot cards. I got a full house and four people died. — Steven Wright
• No Limit Hold'em - Hours of boredom followed by moments of sheer terror.
• Fook the floosh droo!
• "I guess the sayings' true. In the poker game of life, women are the rake man. They are the f---kin' rake." - Worm (Rounders, 1998)
• when i folded an A-7 suited under the gun which would've ended up giving me the small end of a mini jackpot, my dad said, "yeah, if i would've driven to Tucson, I would've found that diamond ring. But i don't drive to Tucson."
• God does not play dice with the universe; He plays an ineffible game of his own devising, which might be compared, from the perspective of any of the other players, to being involved in an obscure and complex version of poker in a pitch dark room, with blank cards, for infinite stakes, with a dealer who won't tell you the rules, and who smiles all the time. --Gaiman and Pratchett's "Good Omens"
• Upon entering a cardroom in which a player had never before played, he asked the floorman for a 10-20 hold-em seat. The floorman dutifully put him on the list and told him that the only available seat was at 3-6 Omaha HiLo. The player quipped, "No, I don't have enough money to play limits that high."