10 Random Poker Quotes

• Liquor up front, poker in the rear
• "I got a full house! Whatchu got, sucker?" "Gee, does that beat me? All I got is two pair: a pair-a ones...and, uh, ANUDDA pair-a ones." -Nasta Canasta & Bugs Bunny, "Barbary Coast Bunny"
• (after a particularly bad beat) "that was a terrible call" "it's called gambling" "no it's called really sucking at life especially poker and trying to throw your money away because your life is useless and you have been pondering suicide for the last week but getting lucky enough to keep it"
• Poker is like masturbating. It's fun, highly addictive, and eventually gives you the feeling of getting fucked.
• The best thing about that hand was I wasn't in it
• "Last night I stayed up late playing poker with Tarot cards. I got a full house and four people died." -- Steven Wright
• i dont play any two suited cards. I play any two non suited cards, that way i am drawing at two different flushes
• Poker is for fat, American losers.
• "Losers always whine about their best. Winners go home and fuck the prom queen."
• "I guess the sayings' true. In the poker game of life, women are the rake man. They are the f---kin' rake." - Worm (Rounders, 1998)