10 Random Poker Quotes

• I can't raise it up. - Cow Jacobs
• Trying to find the odds (not percentage) for this hand. One person has JJ the other 1010. On the flop is J 10 10, what are the odds of this happening?
• "You will show your poker greatness by the hands you fold, not the hands you play." -Dan Reed
• "Poker is just like the fucking universe man, the different combinations and outs are infinite so it's pointless racking your mind about bad beats and shit" Stephen Morris
• To win a bit of money, make your opponent think your hand is stronger than it is. To win a lot of money, make him think your hand is weaker than it is. - Josh Avery
• Son, when a man bets you that the jack of spades will rise out of the dwck and squirt water in your ear: son, don't take that bet, for, as sure as eggs is eggs, you'll end up with a wet ear.
• In the game of life, women are the rake. - Worm
• "It's always good to get a nice dick-suckin before a tournament...it calms the senses." Alex Powers
• Think of how stupid the median poker player is. By definition, half of them are dumber than that.
• No Limit Hold'em - Hours of boredom followed by moments of sheer terror.