10 Random Poker Quotes

• I play like a mullet: tight up front and loose in the back.
• If you lock 100 retards in a room and make them play a tournament, one of them has to win. If you do that in each state, you will produce 50 state champions. If you lock those 50 retards in a room, call it the Poker Championship of the Universe, one of them has to win, and then PokerStars gets 10%.
• Liquor up front, poker in the rear
• "So, what did you have?" "A pair...of balls."
• "I'd rather be lucky than good" - Lefty Gomez
• "No river, no fish."
• Nixon financed his first political campaign with money he won playing poker against his fellow naval officers.
• "It's hard work. Gambling. Playing poker. Don't let anyone tell you different. Think about what it's like sitting at a poker table with people whose only goal is to cut your throat, take your money, and leave you out back talking to yourself about what went wrong inside. That probably sounds harsh. But that's the way it is at the poker table. If you don't believe me, then you're the lamb that's going off to the slaughter." Stu Unger, three-time WSOP Champion
• Most poker players agree, having sex is much akin to playing a game - both require a good hand.
• Poker is for fat, American losers.