10 Random Poker Quotes

• For all you probability freaks, remember to consider the probability that an opponent is lying. Generally, liars dig holes and keep on lying, at least in the short run, as they try to climb out. Adjust your math prowess accordingly. Tells are paramount, as much or more as your calculating brain is. Poker becomes super-multi-variable when the psychological realm is joined with that already beautiful world of card probabilities. -- a mathematician
• Deal 'em, and read 'em. Ralph Malph
• How can I miss the flop so bad that I don't even have a straight draw? -Jdoe
• im going to 2 out you to death
• When you win... Rub it in!!! When you lose.. Drink the booze!!!!! Los Altos Dirt Bikers
• "Percentage players die broke too, Burt." -Fast Eddie Felson "The Hustler"
• God does not play dice with the universe; He plays an ineffible game of his own devising, which might be compared, from the perspective of any of the other players, to being involved in an obscure and complex version of poker in a pitch dark room, with blank cards, for infinite stakes, with a dealer who won't tell you the rules, and who smiles all the time. --Gaiman and Pratchett's "Good Omens"
• Most poker players agree, having sex is much akin to playing a game - both require a good hand.
• "No river, no fish."
• Think of how stupid the average poker player is. By definition, half of them are dumber than that.