10 Random Poker Quotes

• Poker is like a horse, five letters, two vowels
• Hold em' is like sex... everyone thinks they are great at it, but most people dont know what the hell they are doing.
• Poker is like masturbating. It's fun, highly addictive, and eventually gives you the feeling of getting fucked.
• I cried because I had no draw, until I met a man with no pair.
• Sex is good, but poker lasts longer.
• Fish don't eat Nutz!
• when a player asks me for lucky chips, i say they weren't lucky for the person i got them from
• "What've you got, Layne?" "You BEAT." Final table banter between Layne Flack and Mike "The Mouth" Matusow. $ 6,000 No Limit Hold'em Final Day 2004 Ultimatebet.com Poker Classic Radisson Aruba Resort & Casino, Palm Beach
• I play like a mullet: tight up front and loose in the back.
• "It's hard work. Gambling. Playing poker. Don't let anyone tell you different. Think about what it's like sitting at a poker table with people whose only goal is to cut your throat, take your money, and leave you out back talking to yourself about what went wrong inside. That probably sounds harsh. But that's the way it is at the poker table. If you don't believe me, then you're the lamb that's going off to the slaughter." --Stu Unger, three-time WSOP Champion