10 Random Poker Quotes

• Most of these quotes are abysmal and submitted by the sort of idiots who fill the partypoker chatbox with words like 'phuktard'
• No bad beat can withstand the assault of laughter!
• "I better straighten out my game, before I flush all my money down the toilet" - D. Drury
• I guess if luck wasn't involved, i'd win every tournament -Phil Helmuth
• " The commonest mistake in history is underestimating your opponent; happens at the poker table all the time."
• "Does this look like a man beat by jacks!"-Rounders
• "No river, no fish."
• How do you get a professional poker player off your porch? Pay him for the pizza.
• God does not play dice with the universe; He plays an ineffible game of his own devising, which might be compared, from the perspective of any of the other players, to being involved in an obscure and complex version of poker in a pitch dark room, with blank cards, for infinite stakes, with a dealer who won't tell you the rules, and who smiles all the time. --Gaiman and Pratchett's "Good Omens"
• "There are few things that are so unpardonably neglected in our country as poker. The upper class knows very little about it. Now and then you find ambassadors who have sort of a general knowledge of the game, but the ignorance of the people is fearful. Why, I have known clergymen, good men, kind-hearted, liberal, sincere, and all that, who did not know the meaning of a "flush". It is enough to make one ashamed of the species." --Mark Twain