10 Random Poker Quotes

• Sex is good, but poker lasts longer.
• when a player asks me for lucky chips, i say they weren't lucky for the person i got them from
• I have two small pair.....8's and 8's.
• "Listen, here's the thing. If you can't spot the sucker in the first half hour at the table, then you ARE the sucker." - Mike McDermott, "Rounders"
• If you lock 100 retards in a room and make them play a tournament, one of them has to win. If you do that in each state, you will produce 50 state champions. If you lock those 50 retards in a room, call it the Poker Championship of the Universe, one of them has to win, and then PokerStars gets 10%.
• Whaddya think you're playing against- an empty chair?
• "Never say 'Whoa' to a mud puddle" -- Anonymous $4-to-go NL A-5 Lowball Table, Cameo Club Palo Alto CA, 1977
• Play like a cunt, get fucked like one!
• You should pay as much as possible for a free card.
• If you don't want to get beat on the river, don't get in a hand with me. -- Dan Nelson