10 Random Poker Quotes

• they call it poker because the word "FUCK" was taken.
• God does not play dice with the universe; He plays an ineffible game of his own devising, which might be compared, from the perspective of any of the other players, to being involved in an obscure and complex version of poker in a pitch dark room, with blank cards, for infinite stakes, with a dealer who won't tell you the rules, and who smiles all the time. --Gaiman and Pratchett's "Good Omens"
• " Dear Lord, help me to break even. I need the money."
• you cannot have everything....where would you put it. (steven wright)
• If you can't quit the best hand, you can't play.
• Always play hands where both hole cards are different suits. It doubles the possibility of hitting a flush. Anon.
• See AA before the flop is like a smile from the girl of your dreams, see AA lose to a pour hand on the river feels like the same chick just gave you a bad case of blue balls
• I cried because I had no draw, until I met a man with no pair.
• Last night I stayed up late playing poker with Tarot cards. I got a full house and four people died. — Steven Wright
• "I'm broke one day and have a fortune the next day, and I don't give a damn" --Jack "Treetop" Straus--