10 Random Poker Quotes

• how do you know when simon trumper has just got lucky? a bit of his hair falls out.
• Last night I stayed up late playing poker with Tarot cards. I got a full house and four people died. — Steven Wright
• I play like a mullet: tight up front and loose in the back.
• Think of how stupid the average poker player is. By definition, half of them are dumber than that.
• If you lock 100 retards in a room and make them play a tournament, one of them has to win. If you do that in each state, you will produce 50 state champions. If you lock those 50 retards in a room, call it the Poker Championship of the Universe, one of them has to win, and then PokerStars gets 10%.
• when i folded an A-7 suited under the gun which would've ended up giving me the small end of a mini jackpot, my dad said, "yeah, if i would've driven to Tucson, I would've found that diamond ring. But i don't drive to Tucson."
• Liquor in the front, Poker in the rear.
• Sign hanging in old time saloon: Liquor in the front, poker in the rear. -The old sage.
• If there was no luck involved I'd win every time. - Phil Hellmuth
• "Poker is 100% skill, 50% luck" - Phil Hellmuth