10 Random Poker Quotes

• Think of how stupid the median poker player is. By definition, half of them are dumber than that.
• Please screen your these quotes, most of the crap people submit here don't classify as poker quotes at all, they just express how badly those persons misunderstand the game of poker or how proud they are that they understand elemntry concepts such as "counting outs" or "pot odds", no one cares jerks
• Last night I stayed up late playing poker with Tarot cards. I got a full house and four people died. — Steven Wright
• Sex is like poker. It feels better to go all in. --Jarod Kintz
• If you don't want to get beat on the river, don't get in a hand with me. -- Dan Nelson
• Poker is for loners.
• Poker is like masturbating. It's fun, highly addictive, and eventually gives you the feeling of getting fucked.
• "There are few things that are so unpardonably neglected in our country as poker. The upper class knows very little about it. Now and then you find ambassadors who have sort of a general knowledge of the game, but the ignorance of the people is fearful. Why, I have known clergymen, good men, kind-hearted, liberal, sincere, and all that, who did not know the meaning of a "flush". It is enough to make one ashamed of the species." --Mark Twain
• The next best thing to playing and winning is playing and losing. --Nick the Greek
• I cried because I had no draw, until I met a man with no pair.