10 Random Poker Quotes

• If luck wasn't a factor, I'd win every one. -Phil Hellmuth
• Last night I stayed up late playing poker with Tarot cards. I got a full house and four people died. — Steven Wright
• Overhead at a ring game during a tournament when people where discussing there bad beat knock outs etc "Ya I got knocked out of both tournies the same way....I got caught Bluffing"
• "Percentage players die broke too, Burt." -Fast Eddie Felson "The Hustler"
• God does not play dice with the universe; He plays an ineffible game of his own devising, which might be compared, from the perspective of any of the other players, to being involved in an obscure and complex version of poker in a pitch dark room, with blank cards, for infinite stakes, with a dealer who won't tell you the rules, and who smiles all the time. --Gaiman and Pratchett's "Good Omens"
• Upon entering a cardroom in which a player had never before played, he asked the floorman for a 10-20 hold-em seat. The floorman dutifully put him on the list and told him that the only available seat was at 3-6 Omaha HiLo. The player quipped, "No, I don't have enough money to play limits that high."
• If you raise with 72 offsuit, you get to raise when the flops is 7-7-2, ... once in your life. If you fold 72 offsuit, you get the free time to study your opponents or the waitresses and avoid polishing the rail with your sweater ... tough decision!
• Most poker players agree, having sex is much akin to playing a game - both require a good hand.
• "You can shear a sheep many times; you can skin it only once." -- Amarillo Slim
• Poker - love the pain or play checkers. - MoeSyzslak