10 Random Poker Quotes

• If you lock 100 retards in a room and make them play a tournament, one of them has to win. If you do that in each state, you will produce 50 state champions. If you lock those 50 retards in a room, call it the Poker Championship of the Universe, one of them has to win, and then PokerStars gets 10%.
• When I play badly, I lose fast. When I play well, I lose slowly. In a tournament, the net result is the same: I LOSE! - RH 11-6-05
• I have found that when my reasoning for making a call amounts to, "Aww, fuck it." it is usually the wrong move.
• The only way to win is to play. Unfortunetly, it is also the only way to loose.
• A pair of Aces with a low kicker is like a chick without nipples... -doyle brunson, circa 1986
• "Oh give me a break, Ace-eight! I guess some people like getting their money in as a 3-to-1 underdog." -Phil Hellmuth, at the 2004 WSOP
• Don't challenge strong players, challange weak ones. That's what they're there for. - John Vorhaus, author of Killer Poker
• Play like a cunt, get fucked like one!
• Son, when a man bets you that the jack of spades will rise out of the dwck and squirt water in your ear: son, don't take that bet, for, as sure as eggs is eggs, you'll end up with a wet ear.
• "You can shear a sheep many times; you can skin it only once." -- Amarillo Slim